Archive for the ‘Big Brain Answers’ category

Big Brain Answers

January 31, 2010

Question from R. L. Boston, MA
Dear Big Brain: I just saw an advertisement for Raincoats. Why would rain need a coat?
Answer: The BIG BRAIN is sometimes amazed at these questions. Rain would need a coat for the same reason we would need a coat. To keep from getting wet.  Is it me…tell me it’s me. Thanks for your support.

Big Brain Answers

November 9, 2009

Question from L. K. Kingsland, NJ
Dear Big Brain: Does The Big Brain ever get sick?
Answer: Good question. The BIG BRAIN doesn’t really get sick however sometimes his brain does throb due to its enormous size. This generally makes The BIG BRAIN hungry which leads to a snack which generally solves the problem. Thanks and have a nice day

Big Brain Answers

February 1, 2009

Question from H. R. New York, NY
Dear Big Brain: Why is Pluto no longer a planet?
Answer: The BIG BRAIN is confused, Pluto is a dog and has never been a planet. Never write the The BIG BRAIN again.

Big Brain Answers

January 10, 2009

Question from K. H. Tuscon, AZ
Dear Big Brain: Why is ice cold?
Answer: Ice is cold because it’s frozen. This is not rocket science people. The BIG BRAIN needs a cookie. Thanks and have a nice day.

Big Brain Answers

January 1, 2009

Question from K. G. Fresno, CA
Dear Big Brain: What is dirt made of and where does it come from?
Answer: I’m glad you asked. Dirt seems to be made of some brown material of unknown origin. As to where it it comes from, that’s easy, its always been here. Thanks and have a nice day.

Big Brain Answers

December 25, 2008

Question from D. S. Seattle, WA
Dear Big Brain: Why am I here?
Answer: The Big Brain is glad you asked, Actually, that depends on where you really are, unless of course, you don’t mean it in the literal sense. The Big Brain however believes he knows what you mean. You mean what is my purpose. Is this all there is, this seemingly meaningless existence can’t be it. This useless day after day after day of wasted time, wasted energy, and ultimately, a wasted life. Is that what you mean? Well, the Big Brain has some good news. There is a reason you’re here and that reason is to fulfill your destiny. Well then, what is my destiny you say. It can be summed up in two simple phrases. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength and love thy neighbour as thyself. You do have to begin however, and that step has to be taken by you. I sincerely hope that you do. If you don’t know where to start look here.

Big Brain Answers

December 20, 2008

Question from B. N. Los Angeles, CA
Dear Big Brain: Why is it that a lemon is yellow but an orange is orange?
Answer: I’m glad you asked. The BIG BRAIN believes there are some mysteries in the universe that are best left unanswered and this is one of them. Thanks for your support.

Big Brain Answers

December 13, 2008

Question from A. M. Fresno, CA
Dear Big Brain: Why are all snowflakes different?
Answer: That’s a very good question. The BIG BRAIN believes that snowflakes are different because they come from different molds. The BIG BRAIN isn’t quite sure who makes all these molds (actually he does have an inkling) but nevertheless someone does so now you have your answer. Thanks for your support.

Big Brain Answers

December 6, 2008

Question from H. L. Los Angeles, CA
Dear Big Brain: What are volcanoes and why do the erupt?
Answer: The BIG BRAIN believes that volcanoes are kind of like noses for the earth. Sometimes they just have to blow, but in this instance there are no tissues big enough to take care of the problem and there just ends up being a big mess. Thanks and have a nice day.

Big Brain Answers

November 29, 2008

Question from T. M. Austin, TX
Dear Big Brain: Where does milk come from?
Answer: The BIG BRAIN often wonders why people ask such obvious questions. Consequently, the BIG BRAIN shall refrain from sarcasm and simply answer the question. Milk comes from the store. Thanks and never write The BIG BRAIN again.